


Bridal Style

by idrilhadhafang



Series: Darkpilot Crack [3]
Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Scene, Alternate Universe - Crack, Armitage Hux is So Done, Dark Comedy, Dark Crack, Inspired By Tumblr, Inspired by Fanart, Kylo Ren Being a Little Shit, M/M, Only Darkpilot, Sassy Kylo Ren, The Implied Torture Is Not The Part That’s Funny, bridal carry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-28
Updated: 2020-10-28
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:21:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27254098
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idrilhadhafang/pseuds/idrilhadhafang
Summary: Hux has questions about Kylo’s handling of the situation with Poe Dameron.
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Kylo Ren
Series: Darkpilot Crack [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1943092
Comments: 6
Kudos: 9
Collections: Allbingo, Star Wars Crack





	Bridal Style

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: Crackfic  
> Disclaimer: I own nothing.
> 
> Warnings: Implied torture (and I swear that that’s not the part that’s funny!).
> 
> Author’s Notes: Call this a combination of writer’s block and Things I Should Have Written Before TROS. (There’s a lot of that) As for “how this got here”, a Reylo shipper made a comment about Kylo carrying Rey bridal style in TFA (which flew over my slasher-movie-watching head), and commented on how Kylo didn’t carry Poe like that. A Darkpilot shipper drew fanart of the “Darkpilot bridal carry” that never happened (which I unfortunately can’t find). I wrote a fic about the concept. Yeah...context is for Tumblr.

  
  
“Is there any reason you had to carry him to the interrogation room, Ren?”  
  
Kylo had to fight the urge to roll his eyes even as Hux looked critically over Poe, who was currently unconscious and cradled in his arms. It occurred to Kylo that he looked so very fragile and almost breakable — of course, he wasn’t. But he seemed that way. Especially in comparison to the much more muscular and much taller Kylo.   
  
“It’s a new procedure for how I treat my prisoners,” Kylo said sarcastically. “Did you not notice?”  
  
It was worth it, seeing Hux look from Poe to Kylo in absolute astonishment, seeming at a loss for a witty retort. Then, “You’re...attached to him.” Hux said that the same way you’d say “The building’s on fire”.  
  
Kylo sighed. Hux was catching on at least. Time to make up a new cover story. “I’m attached to him not being _manhandled.”_  
  
“And somehow you carrying him doesn’t count.”  
  
“Do you have anything productive to add,” Kylo said evenly, “Besides trying to overanalyze me using the most proper way to carry someone? It’s not like I’m carrying him over the threshold for a wedding, General.”  
  
A beat.   
  
“And by the way,” Kylo said, “Considering I don’t trust your oafish troopers to interrogate him...I’ll be handling it myself.”  
  
Hux glared at him. “I’m sure Snoke would be very _interested_ to hear of what’s transpired so far.”  
  
"For your sake, General, I suggest you let me deal with it.”  
  
Hux stalked off, muttering something about finding himself headache medicine. Kylo supposed that part of his mission had been accomplished, at least.


End file.
